As a teenager, before the internet had really taken hold, the cringe-worthy east coast bias that is so prevalent on ESPN and the networks was tolerable. The Cardinals were going through a dark time. We had no football team. No one who can read gives a shit about hockey.
Then, as I aged, the internet became a 'thing,' and eventually became the focal point of the universe. Harnessing the new technologies, news and marketing were able to penetrate our lives with all the subtlety of Fox/CBS ensuring the Patriots have an easy schedule.
Now, it's all Boston and New York sports all the time, absent any really good or substantial teams (except the Giants and Celtics. But fuck Kevin Garnett.) I'd except the Patriots, but they have an asterisk, and everyone knows why. And Tom Brady is a giant douche.
And before anyone with those shitty east coast accents start "flappin' der gums," let me remind you that the Red Sox have started buying baseball cards so they can remember what a starting pitcher looks like, while the Yankees are getting on bended knee for ANDY PETITTE. Come on, guys. We're going to pretend this rivalry counts for anything? What, does the winner get free autographs from the first-place Baltimore Orioles?
And the Knicks. My god, how long has this been dragging out? Yes, they made the playoffs, just in time to provide some humor for the other teams. Prior to this year? How bad the Knicks are has been a news story this entire century.
And the Bruins and whatever hockey team plays in New York ... oh yeah, who cares?
There are days, there are, in which I'll lie back, stare up at the stars, and long for the future. It's a future in which every other news story on ESPN isn't about an overrated New York or Boston team. It's a future in which my children, and their children can run free, unshackled from yet another Patriots spooge-fest, or another pathetic fluffing of the Jets, or even another Christ-like weepy sermon on how great it is that the Red Sox were allowed to be so bad for so long, and thank god for steroids, er, I mean, uh, Manny being Manny. I guess the whole team was being Manny in 2004? Whatever.
And when the Red Sox go head-to-head with the Yankees? Pffft. It's American League baseball, guys. It's like baseball, but without all the interesting strategy.
Not to mention that the best rivalries in baseball are really only rivalries for a few years. See the Cardinals and Astros at the turn of the century, which culminated in the 2004 NLCS, the best playoff series any human has ever seen (except maybe the 2011 World Series.)
Hell, even the Yankees and Rays have had a bit of a rivalry at times.
But, no. It's Boston and New York, so Fox and ESPN make sure the entire country is flooded with a raging surge of boring and mediocre baseball.
Not to mention that these two teams take four hours to play their games. Guys, the pitcher doesn't bat! What's happening in these games to slow them down so much? Do they parade the bloody sock around Fenway between each inning? Do they set Bill Buckner on fire and let fans chase him? Are they pausing so the Steinbrenners can take a moment to see how much it'll take to purchase another aging bat instead of a legitimate starting pitcher?
Ah, but I shouldn't speak. I should know my place. I should thank Fox every time they're forced to allow my Cardinals into the playoffs, and I shouldn't protest when we're saddled with a 1030PM game start time in the LDS. I should be thankful that networks aren't allowed to script the scoring (2002 Super Bowl aside). Yet.
Blaine
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